This morning, as I was looking for something to wear, I came across the drawer that used to hold all of my underwire bras. They were colorful, structured, and beautifully designed. Each one represented a different version of me — before cancer, before reconstruction, before I truly understood what it meant to live inside a body that has been changed by survival.
On impulse, I picked one up and tried it on. It didn’t fit. There was a gap in the cup where fullness used to be. The underwire that once lifted and shaped me now felt foreign against my skin. It was not painful, just unfamiliar, like trying on a memory that no longer belonged to me.
In that moment, I felt an overwhelming sense of loss. Not just for my old body, but for the innocence of not having to think twice about something as simple as a bra. I stood there quietly, realizing how much had changed since my double mastectomy, DIEP flap reconstruction, and later, the placement of implants behind my flaps and repositioning of my pectoral muscles. I am grateful to be here, to be alive, and to be whole, but even healing has its own kind of grief.
Before my diagnosis, I associated bras with femininity, shape, and self-expression. After breast cancer, I had to learn that support does not always mean structure, and that sometimes, healing requires softness instead of steel.
I have not worn an underwire bra since my first surgery. Not because I was told not to, but because I no longer needed one to feel put together. My body, reconstructed through DIEP flaps and later refined with implants, now carries its own form of balance. It does not rely on elastic straps or metal wires to stay lifted.
But standing there today, staring at that small gap between my skin and the cup, I realized that what I truly missed was not the bra itself, but the simplicity of the life I lived before cancer. The way I used to take my body for granted. The way I did not have to relearn everything, from clothing to confidence.
This year marks 40 years since the American Cancer Society established Breast Cancer Awareness Month in 1985. In those four decades, early detection and improved treatments have helped reduce breast cancer mortality by more than 40 percent. Source: American Cancer Society, “Turning Awareness Into Action: American Cancer Society Recognizes 40 Years of Breast Cancer Awareness Month.” Pressroom, October 1, 2025. Full link: https://pressroom.cancer.org/40-years-of-breast-cancer-awareness-month
Yet, while awareness has grown, not everyone benefits equally. Underserved communities continue to face barriers to both treatment and reconstruction. According to the journal Cancers, the national breast reconstruction rate remains only about 29.6 percent, with disparities tied to insurance status, access to specialized surgical centers, and socioeconomic factors. Source: Vangsness, K. L., et al., “Barriers to Post-Mastectomy Breast Reconstruction: A Comprehensive Retrospective Study.” Cancers (MDPI), 2025. Full link: https://www.mdpi.com/2072-6694/17/12/2002
Even after surgery, the inequities continue. A 2024 study found that nearly one-third of breast reconstruction survivors no longer wear bras, citing discomfort, limited access to properly fitted options, and emotional disconnect. Source: Liu, Y. T., et al., “Undergarment Needs and Challenges for Breast Cancer Survivors: A Qualitative Study.” PubMed Central (PMC), 2024. Full link: https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC11100881/ The National Institutes of Health
The Breast Cancer Facts & Figures 2024–2025 report also notes that Black women in the United States are about 40 percent more likely to die from breast cancer than White women, despite having similar rates of diagnosis. Source: American Cancer Society. Breast Cancer Facts & Figures 2024–2025. Full link: https://www.cancer.org/content/dam/cancer-org/research/cancer-facts-and-statistics/breast-cancer-facts-and-figures/2024/breast-cancer-facts-and-figures-2024.pdf
These statistics matter because they represent real people, women who, like me, are learning to navigate bodies that do not match what the world expects them to be. Healing after breast cancer is not just about survival. It is about reclaiming dignity, comfort, and the right to feel at home in our own skin.
Redefining Support: Lessons I Have Learned
- Support is emotional as much as it is physical. Healing means creating space for both grief and gratitude.
- Clothing no longer defines confidence. The perfect fit now comes from comfort, not conformity.
- Every scar tells a story. Mine remind me of endurance, courage, and the faith that carried me through.
- Bodies evolve. My bra size may have changed, but my strength has not.
- Awareness is more than pink. It is acknowledging the quiet, personal battles that happen long after treatment ends.
As we honor Breast Cancer Awareness Month, let us remember that awareness is not just about wearing pink, it is about listening. Listening to our bodies, to survivors, to the underserved communities that still fight for access to care, and to the moments that remind us of how far we have come.
Trying on that underwire bra today reminded me that I am no longer who I used to be, and that is okay. My reflection may have changed, but so has my understanding of what true support feels like.
So here is to every woman who has ever stood in front of a mirror and seen both loss and strength staring back at her. You are still whole. You are still beautiful. You are still here.
Sources
- American Cancer Society. “Turning Awareness Into Action: American Cancer Society Recognizes 40 Years of Breast Cancer Awareness Month.” Pressroom. October 1, 2025. Full link: https://pressroom.cancer.org/40-years-of-breast-cancer-awareness-month
- American Cancer Society. Breast Cancer Facts & Figures 2024–2025. Full link: https://www.cancer.org/content/dam/cancer-org/research/cancer-facts-and-statistics/breast-cancer-facts-and-figures/2024/breast-cancer-facts-and-figures-2024.pdf
- Vangsness, K. L., et al. “Barriers to Post-Mastectomy Breast Reconstruction: A Comprehensive Retrospective Study.” Cancers (MDPI), 2025. Full link: https://www.mdpi.com/2072-6694/17/12/2002
- Liu, Y. T., et al. “Undergarment Needs and Challenges for Breast Cancer Survivors: A Qualitative Study.” PubMed Central (PMC), 2024. Full link: https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC11100881/
- Breastcancer.org. “Breast Cancer Awareness Month.” Full link: https://www.breastcancer.org/about-breast-cancer/breast-cancer-awareness-month
Leave a Reply