February 24, 2025
My heart was racing before I even opened my laptop. The idea of stepping back into a world that once drained me, that I barely survived, felt suffocating. But here I am, preparing to return—not because I want to, but because I have to. Because insurance. Because stability. Because security for my family. But my spirit? My spirit is elsewhere, longing for something bigger.
The Weight of Survival
When I was first diagnosed with cancer, my world turned upside down. The stress of navigating my PMS2 and BRCA2 gene mutations, preventative care, a hysterectomy that threw me into surgical menopause, a double mastectomy, chemotherapy, and breast reconstruction was beyond anything I had ever endured. And yet, I still worked full-time. I went to school full-time. I survived a pandemic while managing all of this.
Now, after everything, I am expected to return to the very environment where some of my deepest stress was rooted. But I am not the same. The woman who walked into that office before cancer is not the one standing here today. My priorities, my energy, my very soul have shifted. I have discovered a purpose far greater than a corporate role. And yet, financial security and private insurance hold me tethered to a life that no longer feels like mine.
The Unspoken Struggle of Returning to Work
Many survivors face this silent battle. We endure treatments, we celebrate remission, and then—somehow—we are expected to go back to normal. But what if that normal was part of what broke us? What if the stress, the long hours, the corporate grind contributed to the unraveling of our health?
I have spoken to other survivors who feel the same. Some return to work with a newfound appreciation for life, while others feel disconnected, as if they no longer belong. Some make the bold choice to walk away, following their passion, while others stay, bound by necessity. It is a dilemma that many of us never imagined we would face: how do we return to a life that no longer fits us?
How Do We Cope?
If you are struggling with this transition, you are not alone. Here are some strategies I am trying to implement to find balance between necessity and purpose:
1. Set Boundaries We do not have to return to the same level of overexertion that we once did. Prioritize your health, set limits, and protect your energy. Your survival was not meant to lead you back to burnout.
2. Give Yourself Permission to Change You are not the same person who left. You do not have to fit into the same mold. Allow yourself the grace to evolve, even within your career.
3. Find Small Ways to Infuse Purpose If leaving work isn’t an immediate option, look for ways to make your current environment more meaningful. Whether it’s through mentorship, advocacy, or simply making space for yourself in a new way, purpose can exist in many forms.
4. Have an Exit Strategy (If Needed) If you feel that the workforce is no longer for you, start planning your transition. Small steps can lead to big change, and having a financial and career strategy can make the leap feel less daunting.
5. Find Support Talk to fellow survivors, join groups, or seek therapy. There is power in knowing you are not alone in this battle. Others understand this struggle deeply and can offer insights, reassurance, and validation.
The Truth About Purpose and Survival
I am still figuring out what comes next. I know my heart lies in advocacy, in helping others navigate the storm of cancer, in fighting for better access to early detection and care. I know that my soul feels called to something greater. But I also know that life demands security, and that balancing purpose with practicality is its own journey.
So, for now, I step forward with caution. I listen to my body, I honor my mental health, and I remind myself that surviving cancer was not just about living—it was about living well. If work no longer fits into that definition, then maybe, just maybe, it’s time for a new path. And that’s okay.
To my fellow survivors feeling this same struggle: you are not alone. You are allowed to feel conflicted. You are allowed to choose yourself. And you are allowed to redefine what survival means to you.
Resources for Survivors Navigating Work and Purpose
If you’re feeling lost in this transition, here are some resources that may help:
- Cancer and Careers (www.cancerandcareers.org) — A platform dedicated to helping cancer survivors navigate the workplace.
- National Coalition for Cancer Survivorship (National Coalition for Cancer Survivorship) — Provides support and advocacy for survivors adjusting to life post-treatment.
- American Cancer Society Reach to Recovery Program (www.cancer.org) — Connects survivors with trained volunteers who have been through similar experiences.
- Tigerlily Foundation (www.tigerlilyfoundation.org) — Offers support and empowerment for young women facing breast cancer.
- For the Breast of Us — A community for women of color navigating breast cancer.
- Dr. Monique Gary, DO, MSc, FACS, FSSO and Ricki Fairley — Leading voices in breast cancer advocacy and survivorship.
- Therapy and Counseling — Consider speaking with a mental health professional who specializes in survivorship and career transitions.
Whatever path you take, know that you are not alone. You have already overcome so much, and wherever you go from here, you are worthy of peace, fulfillment, and a future that feels right for you.
Engage & Share Your Story
If this article resonates with you, share your experience in the comments. Let’s support each other on this journey.
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